I am almost 55 years old and I have learned a lot in those years. Especially the last 30 years. The hardest lesson I learned is that I am responsible for my own happiness. What I really hope is that while I was learning this difficult life lesson, I wasn’t a whiner.

Nothing is much worse than listening to someone bitch about how unfair their life has turned out. One of the other things I’ve learned is to just walk away, keep my mouth shut. The whiner only wants to whine. They don’t want the truth or even help.

Just about every unhappy situation I’ve found myself in, I had a hand in putting myself there. Sometimes unhappiness is simply moodiness. So I wait a few hours (not days or weeks) and the feeling wanes.

But when the unhappiness is like a dark cloud following you everywhere you turn, it may be time to take a real look at your life choices.

I’ve worked jobs I hated because I needed a roof over my head and food in my belly. I’ve selected where I needed to live because I didn’t have a car and I need to walk to work. I’ve been fiercely lonely and scared when I made the decision to leave my drug addicted husband whom I loved with all my heart.

4e4352343c790636da374976dceca636What I’ve learned is if I’m truly unhappy I need to look inward and ask myself some hard questions. Every difficult, unhappy situation I have found myself in was a direct result of choices that I made. Other people may have been involved. Other people may have made me promises. But life is a two way street. It all boils down to choices.

If you’re unhappy and you think “If only,” it may be time to put your big girl panties on and start making better decisions. If you’re unhappy take a long hard look in the mirror and then decide you are going to be happy. Make the changes that need to be made by YOU!

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