We’ve all heard and probably even said “If I knew then what I know now………” Sure, we can all look back and see things that we would do differently. If you’re like me, you probably even can recall someone telling you from their own experience that you shouldn’t do this or that at the time you were considering doing this or that. But like all the inexperienced before us and all of those who come afterwards, we have to learn from our own mistakes.
Which brings me to something that has been on my mind for a while now. What do you do when you see someone making life choices that you consider poor? Well, I’m keeping my mouth shut. Especially since I wasn’t asked for an opinion or any advice.
But it is hard. Particularly when someone has already made some less than stellar choices. But they are their choices. Nevertheless, it is hard to sit back and watch someone start down a road that probably has nothing but rough patches and heartache. Of course, I really don’t know how it will all turn out. But I do have my own lifetime of experiences to draw on. I may not have faced the same choices, but I did have similar choices or witnessed others making similar choices.
I guess working through failures is just part of being human. Maybe you have to really live with a mistake to learn from it. But I do question the intelligence of someone who keeps making the wrong life choices over and over and over. Then crying and wondering “Why this always happens to me?”
I guess you just have to sit and wait patiently for their maturity level to reach the point where they realize that they made the choice. No one forced them. I’ve come up with a short list of things I have learned. They may seem vague, but I believe they are important.
- I am in charge of me. That includes all of my actions and all of my feelings
- I can depend on myself.
- Regardless of how it affects others I will do what is best for me.
- I take ownership of my choices. The good ones and the bad ones.
- Life is not fair. It will never be fair.
- You cannot let your now influence your choices for the future.
- Nothing is ever as bad as it seems.
- Assume nothing. If you need to know for sure, ASK!!
- Don’t live in a fantasy world. You have to wake up at some point and it ain’t going to be pretty in 20 years, 10 years, 5 years, or maybe even the day after tomorrow. So you might as well face the facts.
- It really is darkest right before the dawn.