I was brought up in the sweetest, most loving home.  I was fortunate to have two parents that loved me and my sister above all else.  Our well being and needs always came first.  I’m not talking about material things.  I’m talking about love, care, concern, and value.  After talking with friends and relatives over the years, I’ve found that this is not always the case.  All children may go through periods of low self-esteem and problems.  As they grow older they become their own person and start to pull away from the family nucleus.  But in the long run, they always return to the base.

I’m thankful for my base.  My Dad is no longer here, he passed away in 1997 at the age of 62.  As I matured and became a woman, he was not just my father, but my friend.  I could talk to him about anything and everything.  My Mom is still here and is part of my base.  She is my friend and my backbone.  When she is no longer here to listen to me, I have my sister, Trisha. I consider her my very best friend.  She and I are completely and totally open and honest with each other.  We truly value each other as people.  If she wasn’t my sister, I would still choose her as my friend.

Not all families are this way.  In some families there is jealousy, infighting, rudeness, some with chips on their shoulders, and some are just plain mean to each other.  My Dad had a cousin that we spent time with as we were growing up.  This cousin’s children were a little older than us.  They had two boys and twin girls.  The girls were a couple of years older than us.  There always seemed to be controversy and bickering.  To me it just seemed like they genuinely disliked each other.  Even after these children were grown, married, and had families of their own they were not fun to be around.  There was still such jealousy and backbiting.  The mother and one of the daughters dropped in on my Mom a little while back.  She actually breathed a sigh of relief when they left.  All they did was run people (their own family members) down during the whole conversation.  Not one positive thing was said.  Nor did they inquire about our family or how any of us were doing.

In my little family we don’t have these problems.  I have married the sweetest, kindest man.  His daughter, Lindsey treats me and loves me as if I were her own mother.  My sister also married a very sweet and kind man.  She has four beautiful, sweet, loving children.  Their is no jealousy, backbiting, or nastiness.  Between Lindsey, Kennith, Carla, Kristine, and Joseph there is no jealousy.  When they are all together they are as happy as they were when they were children.  All three girls have married wonderful young men who have made wonderful considerate husbands.  Each one is proud of the others accomplishments.

When it comes right down to it these are the only people who are truly 100% important to me.  The other extended family and friends are just icing on the cake.  I love my friends and extended family.  I will always try to be there for them.  But I’ve decided to not let other people’s bitterness and negativity have an impact on me.  When it comes right down to the nitty gritty, the the only people I truly need to make my life complete and happy are my Doug, Mom, Trisha, Lindsey, Kennith, Carla, Kristine, Joseph. 

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