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I have been on a diet for nearly eight weeks. I’ve cut calories, salt, fat, sugar. I’ve done pretty well. Extremely well I think! Until this week that is. It hasn’t been awful, but I’m starting to see little chinks popping up in my day to day life. I know I’ve got to get a handle on it quickly or I will be right back where I started at the end of February.
This week the doughnut stops have drew me in twice. Both mornings I started out eating my homemade breakfast muffin. It is tasty and filling. I’m not hungry when I finish it. But for some reason this week I’ve talked myself into stopping not once, but two times!
The first time was Monday. I had to stop at the doctor’s office on the way in for blood work. The blood work required me to fast the night before. I warmed up my breakfast muffin before I left, wrapped it in foil so that it would stay warm. When I left the doctor’s office I ate my breakfast muffin and finished my water. The trouble was I was really thirsty. So I stopped to get a bottle of water. I was only about 10 minutes from work and could have filled my bottle there. But I stopped and not only got a bottle of water, but also a pig in the blanket and a blueberry donut. By the time I got to work I felt ill. Too much food.
This morning, Thursday, I stopped at the post office to get our mail. I stop on Thursdays because I don’t have to be to work until 9:00 on Thursdays and I’m not rushed. Yes I had my breakfast muffin on the way in. But then I told myself, “You won’t get to eat until late today. You’ll be starving. Just stop and get something. It won’t hurt anything.” So I stopped and got another blueberry donut and then thought “What the hell!” and got a glazed doughnut too.
So now I sit at my desk feeling physically sick to my stomach and stuffed. Why oh why oh why did I let myself stop? It was dumb and I know I have sabotaged myself. I think it all stared with making that whole wheat bread this weekend. I don’t need all these carbs. But there really isn’t anything better than hot buttered bread fresh from the oven.
So back on the wagon I jump. It was just a little stumble in the road I tell myself. I just didn’t have enough healthy snacks around my house this week. Tomorrow I will go to Central Market and stock up on some fruits and veggies. After all tomorrow is a brand new day.
>We always sabotage ourselves. Its human nature. When you were a child, you didn't stop riding your bike after you fell off… you had to ride it to get back home.. but from then on, you knew to avoid the gravel spot where you lost control.