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I have been on a diet for nearly eight weeks.  I’ve cut calories, salt, fat, sugar.  I’ve done pretty well.  Extremely well I think!  Until this week that is.  It hasn’t been awful, but I’m starting to see little chinks popping up in my day to day life.  I know I’ve got to get a handle on it quickly or I will be right back where I started at the end of February.

This week the doughnut stops have drew me in twice.  Both mornings I started out eating my homemade breakfast muffin.  It is tasty and filling.  I’m not hungry when I finish it.  But for some reason this week I’ve talked myself into stopping not once, but two times!

The first time was Monday.  I had to stop at the doctor’s office on the way in for blood work.  The blood work required me to fast the night before.  I warmed up my breakfast muffin before I left, wrapped it in foil so that it would stay warm.  When I left the doctor’s office I ate my breakfast muffin and finished my water.  The trouble was I was really thirsty.  So I stopped to get a bottle of water.  I was only about 10 minutes from work and could have filled my bottle there.  But I stopped and not only got a bottle of water, but also a pig in the blanket and a blueberry donut.  By the time I got to work I felt ill.  Too much food.

This morning, Thursday, I stopped at the post office to get our mail.  I stop on Thursdays because I don’t have to be to work until 9:00 on Thursdays and I’m not rushed.  Yes I had my breakfast muffin on the way in.  But then I told myself, “You won’t get to eat until late today.  You’ll be starving. Just stop and get something. It won’t hurt anything.”  So I stopped and got another blueberry donut and then thought “What the hell!” and got a glazed doughnut too.

So now I sit at my desk feeling physically sick to my stomach and stuffed.  Why oh why oh why did I let myself stop?  It was dumb and I know I have sabotaged myself.  I think it all stared with making that whole wheat bread this weekend.  I don’t need all these carbs.  But there really isn’t anything better than hot buttered bread fresh from the oven.

So back on the wagon I jump.  It was just a little stumble in the road I tell myself.  I just didn’t have enough healthy snacks around my house this week.  Tomorrow I will go to Central Market and stock up on some fruits and veggies. After all tomorrow is a brand new day.

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